Made the Flight 1 A Team - mistake or suck it up?

NoGoal said:
You sure have drifted from your opening post. FYI, D1 college coaches can't email HS freshmen and sophomores. What your friends DDs are receiving are email blasts for their camps.
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I dunno, the recruiters emailed the coaches specifically mentioning the player's name, performance at the showcases, and their "resume". The DD's coach forwarded to player's parents. I can't remember if they even mentioned a camp - but it certainly wasn't the focus of the messages. What I do remember was the emails generally said there was genuine interest, they looked forward to seeing them progress and to keep in touch. These parents did not reach out to any of those schools initially either - so it wasn't a "thank you letter".
 
LilStriker said:
I dunno, the recruiters emailed the coaches specifically mentioning the player's name, performance at the showcases, and their "resume". The DD's coach forwarded to player's parents. I can't remember if they even mentioned a camp - but it certainly wasn't the focus of the messages. What I do remember was the emails generally said there was genuine interest, they looked forward to seeing them progress and to keep in touch. These parents did not reach out to any of those schools initially either - so it wasn't a "thank you letter".
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You seem to know a little to much about college recruiting, yet your opening post paints you as being naive about club soccer.

Didn't you post state, your DD was with a lower level team last year?
 
LilStriker said:
Example - the average person (incl. myself) thinks that being well rounded was what schools look for - it's generally a desired trait and we're often impressed by these multi-athletes or incredibly talented people who are good at just about everything.

..
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This is the biggest misimpression about elite schools. They generally look for people who are "well oblonged". You have to have a well rounded set of interests and hobbies, as well as check off the obligatory charity and sport, but you don't need to excel at all of them. The other big misimpression is that being social/popular isn't important-- one of the areas you are evaluated in is whether you'd be "a good rommate". But you do need one or two things you are passionate about....and those things should make sense in the overall scheme of your application (if you are going into polisci, doing robotics competitions isn't a good fit...unless you have a really good and unusual explanation....same with the premed major that does dance team and isn't interested in continuing dance competition....doesn't show a whole lot of passion just that you are doing it to get into a good college to become a doctor). The degree of oblongedness varies from school to school, year to year.
 
NoGoal said:
You seem to know a little to much about college recruiting, yet your opening post paints you as being naive about club soccer.

Didn't you post state, your DD was with a lower level team last year?
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I actually had never played college ball, nor even played soccer, this is our first kid, the whole college recruiting thing is entirely new to us, it's all from reading/lurking these forums and talking with friends who are just starting the process... so I'm really thankful for everyone chiming in. We obviously feel our DD has some potential - she certainly loves the game, they were on an A team before, but also at a smaller club where it's more "family" I guess - less intense. We were really anxious/excited anticipating whether or not we would make this team - we had all these backup plans if we didn't. My OP was asking if this culture at top tier clubs was typical and basically trying to understand the consequences of leaving or asking to switch to the B team. If DA is the "gate" to college ball and that's her goal, then well, we better suck it up - it's a means to an end that can help her achieve her longer term goals. If there are other paths, then, it certainly helps to know that.

My spouse is also a legacy alumn at one of the Ivy's - so that's also why I pay more attention to it. I clearly see the difference in her college experience and mine - that's one of my regrets, I was a pretty talented kid but I went about it the wrong way - was good at too many things instead of just picking one and being great, my parents did the best they could, but had no idea what they were doing... I never knew the path to get to where I wanted to be. I've been fortunate and have had the opportunity to be around very successful people and that's the thing I've learned - there's no guaranteed success in life, but the most common reason people are successful is because they understand what it takes to achieve their goals - the path to take. So it's very personal for me to make sure I help my kids find the best path to achieve their goals - they still have to do the work, but it's my job to make sure they're not wandering the desert for 40 years.

I didn't learn that from college recruiting or soccer, I just learned that from life...
 
Eagle33 said:
I understand not mentioning the club, but the age group?
Troll alert!View attachment 899
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The soccer community is a lot smaller than you think...

besides, it's a no win for me - if I state age group, you guys will either be like, you're crazy, they're too young! or you're crazy, it's way too late, your kid will never make it if they haven't already!

The better question would be - does it make a difference what age group she's in and at what age group would the decision shift?
 
LilStriker said:
The soccer community is a lot smaller than you think...

besides, it's a no win for me - if I state age group, you guys will either be like, you're crazy, they're too young! or you're crazy, it's way too late, your kid will never make it if they haven't already!

The better question would be - does it make a difference what age group she's in and at what age group would the decision shift?
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Of course it does, it makes a huge difference. No college coach will be looking at 9yo on a Flight 1 team
 
Eagle33 said:
Of course it does, it makes a huge difference. No college coach will be looking at 9yo on a Flight 1 team
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So at what age does it start mattering? 12? 13? 14? We know this year isn't such a big deal, but if we switch to the B team and a year or two from now they still aren't looking for players from B team for the DA team, then we've screwed ourselves. Seems like a lot of folks on these threads show concern about certain clubs preferring to recruit from outside for their A teams rather than from their B.
 
So you have a 9 or 10 year old daughter, who plays on a 'top flight 1 team', but doesn't start. However in her father's opinion she is 'easily top 3' in speed and skills. And based on this you are thinking about ivy league soccer and USWNT?

"Multiple outside coaches have said she should play ODP" and "She has no flaws in her game"

These are clearly made up facts.

Get a life.
 
rocket_file said:
So you have a 9 or 10 year old daughter, who plays on a 'top flight 1 team', but doesn't start. However in her father's opinion she is 'easily top 3' in speed and skills. And based on this you are thinking about ivy league soccer and USWNT?

"Multiple outside coaches have said she should play ODP" and "She has no flaws in her game"

These are clearly made up facts.

Get a life.
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I dunno buddy... let's see, 48 replies to a topic that I'm sure plenty of folks experience at any age level - if this thread doesn't interest you, seems to me that you're the one who needs to get a life, no?

btw, re: "These are clearly made up facts" so which is it, are these facts or are they made up? make up your mind. you can't just make up a fact dumbass. do i need to explain it you?
 
LilStriker said:
Well, she DOES want to play at the highest level possible. Hands down she loves soccer and it's her #1 passion, next is computer programming, not even kidding. She chose to join this team knowing she didn't have any friends but playing with better players will only make her better. It's just that none of us expected it to be this way.

Realistically, I think she has potential, I say she's middle of the road right now because while she's clearly within the top 3 on the team regarding her skills and speed, there ARE areas she just needs to improve and develop in - but nothing that can't be fixed or taught. I also suspect that some parents made a "deal" with the coach to have their kid start or get X playing time - anyone know if this actually happens?

For me, I'm perfectly fine if she doesn't make the national team - although she's dreamed of it since she was 4... that's going to have to be all her decision and drive. I just hope she gets to play college ball and given that she's a really smart kid, ideally get recruited by an Ivy down the road. The question is, if she doesn't play DA, will she still get the opportunity and be considered? I know, thinking WAY ahead here, right? but the reality is, some choices lead to more opportunities than others... (Grace T - would love to hear your thoughts on this!)
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Getting the right coach who will teach her and her team to play good soccer with solid skills is probably the most important thing to consider especially for 14 and under.
 
LilStriker said:
So at what age does it start mattering? 12? 13? 14? We know this year isn't such a big deal, but if we switch to the B team and a year or two from now they still aren't looking for players from B team for the DA team, then we've screwed ourselves. Seems like a lot of folks on these threads show concern about certain clubs preferring to recruit from outside for their A teams rather than from their B.
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I think people had no problem with your basic question - if your daughter is unhappy, should you consider moving her to b team. You probably should have just left it at that, without the discussion of Ivy League, uswnt, your opinion that she's top 3, random opinions she is an odp player, her robotics and computer programming genius, her musical genius, etc. It comes across as either being a joke or just seriously obnoxious and out of touch with reality.
 
LilStriker,
Not quite sure why you seem fixated on Ivys. There are a ton of great colleges/universities that will get your kids to where they need to go in life without the added pressure of having to get into those handful of institutions (much less play soccer for one). I'm on the admissions committee for a university medical school and believe me, whether the applicant comes from an Ivy or one of those other quality institutions does not make a difference (at least not in my field). My DDs were both on the second team at DA/ECNL club before coming up to first teams after GU12/13. Keep the pressure off and if they have fun and love the sport they will excel. Key (as stated by lambchop) is to find the right coach that will develop their technical skills and comfort on the ball at youngers, then tactical awareness in the older age group. But having them continue to love the game is key as I'm sure you know, a minority of Ulittles in a top team will actually persevere and continue to the Uolders at college scouting ages. Enjoy the ride with your DD but don't take the fun out with undue pressure/expectations in my opinion.
 
Makes me wonder if your past alias were msoccerm and drtbkchic. These 2 posters were also catfishing within the last month.
 
LilStriker said:
So at what age does it start mattering? 12? 13? 14? We know this year isn't such a big deal, but if we switch to the B team and a year or two from now they still aren't looking for players from B team for the DA team, then we've screwed ourselves. Seems like a lot of folks on these threads show concern about certain clubs preferring to recruit from outside for their A teams rather than from their B.
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48 replies of which nearly a dozen are from you. And another 5 or so asked what age group.

Here is why age group matters:
  • A kid prior to middle school should LOVE everything about her team. Her coach, her teammates, the parents on the sideline, and the amount of time she has outside of soccer to do other things she cares about (school, friends, another sport, walking the dog, etc) . Being excited about practice; being excited about going to lunch with some of the team after a game; looking forward to a carpool to a far away game; and getting quality training will instill her love for the game. Which hopefully will translate into her wanting to put in extra work outside of practice.
  • Puberty can be a big game changer for short or long term. The kid that was a little small and a little slow all of the sudden is a bit bigger and a bit faster. The speedy, mature kid packs on some weight before she hits a growth spurt and slows down a bit. The kid who plays like a bull in a china shop and never rests, gets an overuse injury and needs to sit out a few weeks.
  • This is why it's important to have a good sideline that recognizes a lot can change and will support the players. And a coach that can recognize this also.
  • If the kid is 9 years old and joined a club because they have DA or ECNL for you in a few years and you are worried that moving to the "b" team will have a lasting impact- Take a look at how many coaches move around each year. And how many kids move around each year. By the time she is 13, I'm willing to bet that some of the current DA teams will change (they'll either leave the program, will get acquired or go out of business).
 
chargerfan said:
I think people had no problem with your basic question - if your daughter is unhappy, should you consider moving her to b team. You probably should have just left it at that, without the discussion of Ivy League, uswnt, your opinion that she's top 3, random opinions she is an odp player, her robotics and computer programming genius, her musical genius, etc. It comes across as either being a joke or just seriously obnoxious and out of touch with reality.
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Appreciate the comment. The only reason I brought it up was to provide context - because yes, she's not starting and there are a-holes out there that would automatically say that she must suck, give it up - so I wanted to provide context with true feedback we've received - essentially that coaches around us all felt she had potential - she's not there today and she may go nowhere with soccer - but she has potential as of now and she wasn't one of the players taken just because they needed to finish the roster. By no means was it intended to be obnoxious. I am proud of my kid, just like most other parents - I also know more than anyone her faults, flaws in her game, and everything else - I never complained she was on the bench, but I know she needs playing time to develop.

The reality is, most of us whether we post it in the forum or not, from day 1, felt that their kid had potential. It could all change dramatically in a matter of days - especially in their teens with hormones, etc... but so long as the potential is there and the desire is there, we want to help give them the best options possible, right? The last thing I want to do is to guide them in a way that will hinder their future prospects. We're all still figuring this out and that's why I posted... I'm sure I will look at this years from now and laugh - I don't blame you guys for thinking I'm crazy and to relax. but right now, it's stressful - especially when you're on a team where all the other parents are crazy too and this is all they talk about.
 
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