What happened to THE Luis Andres thread?

Kicker4Life said:
It is unfortunate, but the reality is, he is projecting his dreams upon his DD. She may survive this with drive and passion if he is able to allow her to play and grow without too much pressure. I do believe his heart is in the right place but the sooner he grasps the concept that this is her journey and not his, the better his relationship with his DD will be as she enters the dreaded puberty years.
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Wow, what are you, a shrink?!
 
Luis Andres said:
@Fact hey get your facts straight. We didn’t lose the game, we tied. and did not make it to the finals. Wether he was playing the game for development or to prove a point, it’s a matter of Interpretation. I was never bashing on the little girl, I was just trying to get opinions on how someone else may have handled the situation. And a possible solution to help her.
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Excuse me, you are correct that u tied and this did not make the finals. But I said behind everything else that I have said. You bashed the girl, period!
 
Fact said:
You are a pathetic loser that is living vicariously thru your kid and no other child is good enough to play with your prince. Obviously you have not accomplished anything in your life to be proud of. I am done with you. Karma is a bitch!
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Please leave this thread. You seem to be the cancer of it anyway. Get lost
 
Fact said:
Excuse me, you are correct that u tied and this did not make the finals. But I said behind everything else that I have said. You bashed the girl, period!
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No he didn’t, he just said that this girl consistently made mistakes, cost them games, and asked for advice on what he could do to help the situation. I don’t recall him ever bashing the kid. That’s made up by you guys.

Stating that the kid gave up goals and cost them the game is either true or false... it happens. It’s either fact or fiction. He acknowledged his own kid cost them a game just now... also a fact, not a judgement and not knocking his kid.

Reality is, we’ve all had kids like that on our teams... it’s the coaches job to deal with it, not ours. He gets it now - hopefully.
 
You can look at my post #90 for this quote from you “Thanks guys, not sure what happened today but the coach deliberately made some changes in the lineups to not advance to the finals. Done with this team. Done with this thread... @Dominic please delete my account. Thanks”.

And you did bash the girl by saying that she should not play and not be on the team. Only after people started to defend her did you turn and say that you were trying to help her. =Bashing a kid!
 
Supermodel56 said:
No he didn’t, he just said that this girl consistently made mistakes, cost them games, and asked for advice on what he could do to help the situation. I don’t recall him ever bashing the kid. That’s made up by you guys.

Stating that the kid gave up goals and cost them the game is either true or false... it happens. It’s either fact or fiction. He acknowledged his own kid cost them a game just now... also a fact, not a judgement and not knocking his kid.

Reality is, we’ve all had kids like that on our teams... it’s the coaches job to deal with it, not ours. He gets it now - hopefully.
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Cost them games? Isn’t Soccer a team sport and how is that not bashing a child? Goodnight.
 
Fact said:
You can look at my post #90 for this quote from you “Thanks guys, not sure what happened today but the coach deliberately made some changes in the lineups to not advance to the finals. Done with this team. Done with this thread... @Dominic please delete my account. Thanks”.

And you did bash the girl by saying that she should not play and not be on the team. Only after people started to defend her did you turn and say that you were trying to help her. =Bashing a kid!
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That was my opinion and then I left it for interpretation based on the fact that there were line up changes to his usual ways. He didn’t deliberately try to lose the game just played a different game. And it was after that then O l realized that it’s more about development than winning games. And I mentioned I had a change of heart on that subject. That experience and listening to you guys is what made me rethink it again. But who cares. That’s the past we were talking about the development of my DD and the way I’m raising her. Stick to the subject @Fact in fact you said you were done right? Leaving the thread
 
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Fact said:
Cost them games? Isn’t Soccer a team sport and how is that not bashing a child? Goodnight.
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Well, it happens. Here’s an example, in U9. when my kid was playing defense, prior to the game, I specifically reminded her to watch the back post because I knew she liked to go help out on defense. What did she do? she went in to help in the middle instead of watching the back post and marking the outside wing, they passed it out wide and the other team scored... She did it twice and cost them the game. Not bashing my kid, just fact.

Yes, soccer is a team sport, but she didn’t do her job in that game.
 
Luis Andres said:
lol. Soccer career, All I said was that she had a goal. And that can change in a few years. But if she has the right values and beliefs and if she is able to find her why by that time, she’ll be on her way to accomplish anything she wants to do in life. I’m not here telling you guys how to raise your kids and what values and beliefs they should have.
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From our vantage point, YOU have a goal. I'm not aware of any 9-year old asking to watch film.
 
Supermodel56 said:
Well, it happens. Here’s an example, in U9. when my kid was playing defense, prior to the game, I specifically reminded her to watch the back post because I knew she liked to go help out on defense. What did she do? she went in to help in the middle instead of watching the back post and marking the outside wing, they passed it out wide and the other team scored... She did it twice and cost them the game. Not bashing my kid, just fact.

Yes, soccer is a team sport, but she didn’t do her job in that game.
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Presumably you were the coach of the team and could therefore would presume to tell your kid where they should position themselves on defense? Supposedly the keeper (whose job it usually is to watch the far post) was out of position and didn't know how to defend the cut back cross? I guess the defender who was picking up the passing player just let the passing player execute that pass into a dangerous area? And the midfielders and forwards did their job to prevent it from getting into the attacking third? Or maybe they are 8 and supposed to make mistakes because that's how they learn?

When my son was U10 playing keeper it was the final game of a tournament for the team to advance into the finals or not. He had been playing for just the spring season as a full time keeper (despite our stated preference to the coaches that he should be splitting and getting field time), had not yet started with his private trainer because he wasn't old enough, and had been relying on the club trainers for training (a position which had a lot of turnover and some of which weren't very good). He had been told repeatedly never let it bounce in the area...to basket catch it (he also didn't have a baseball background...his other sports were long distance running and martial arts) but had never seen it in a game situation. The score is tied (with 2 own goals from our own team) and an attacking player wallops it high into the air several feet in an arc towards goal. He waits for it to bounce hoping to grab it then but it bounces on the ground, shoots over his head too high for him to jump for it and into the goal. His coach (and I...I was a crazy first year parent too) were both screaming at him "don't let it bounce". We lose the game, and afterwards the coach takes him aside and goes into him for making a mistake he had been repeatedly told not to. The 2 players who got own goals weren't screamed at. Neither was the player who was supposed to be covering the attacker who made that wild crazy reckless shot. Neither was our forward who lost the ball making the play possible. One's thing for sure...my son never made that mistake again....he's had that hail mary ball happen now 3 times and has never let it bounce since. But he was also scapegoated and made to feel horrible when several other players made mistakes along the way.

Soccer is ultimately a game of mistakes. The team that makes the fewest wins. It's why I think the game irritates some Americans, who want the hero that goes out there to score...waiting for a mistake seems to be too negative for some Americans. Kids are going to make mistakes as they learn to play, and a goal is very rarely the result of the mistake of just one player, though some mistakes are more boneheaded than others. The perfect soccer game is actually one that ends 0-0 with both sides giving it their best efforts, yet failing to score.
 
Luis Andres said:
Great question. I guess it has to do with the fact that soccer has been my favorite team sport since I was a kid. And its part of my culture. Also she is my only child so I have all the time in the world to devote to her in a sport and my wife and I decided it would be soccer even though she is a runner. We also play basketball recreationally but not serious in trying to make her an elite basketball player because she will never have the height to compete at an elite level where soccer that is not a requirement.

The reason why it’s important for me to have her become an elite player is because I see the potential for greatness within her natural talents. And I’m setting her up technically to be at a level that when it comes time for her to do things on her own, she will have the proper skills set to do so and shine. At the end of the day it will be up to her to get to the next level not me. All I can do now is set her up in the right direction with the proper skills set.

As far as AYSO. Things are going good. She’s sort of like my assistant coach. My goal for AYSO is to teach her some leadership skills.
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A good runner you say? Let’s hope for your sake and your dreams that she doesn’t try cross country and/or track and find out she can run varsity times as a freshman - you wouldn’t want any distractions on her path to becoming an elite player.

I know it’s been said, but slow down and enjoy the ride. Your daughter is 9. If you keep going at this frantic pace you will both be burned out by the time she’s 14 or 15. When my daughter was that age her and her teammates’ priority was who was going to host the American Doll party in their hotel room during State Cup.
 
The Outlaw said:
From our vantage point, YOU have a goal. I'm not aware of any 9-year old asking to watch film.
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Good grief, give it a rest... nothing wrong with teaching your kid to study the game. I started showing video to my kid when she was in rec at U5. I just showed her highlights of good plays she did, she loved seeing her goals, great passes, etc...it was a huge encouragement to her. you all assume it’s for bad stuff, but it wasn’t.

Around U8, while we scrolled through, she’d start seeing plays she could’ve done better and sometimes groan. I’d encourage her and just ask her If she were to do it again what would she have done differently and we’d talk about it. Do we do it after every game? No. Do I make her do it? No. She usually looks forward to it though and it has become a part of her regular training habit - just like she would for a math test, you celebrate the problems she got right, take a look at what she got wrong and figure out how to do even better next time. She’s awesome at math and she loves it, btw. She loves learning, looks forward to school and homework and she looks forward to soccer...

We all talk about the benefits of sports because it’s an analogy to life, but then say sports should all be about just having fun in a carefree way and they’ll just one day stumble into success. But thats not life from my experience and having fun is very subjective to what you find is fun.... Teach your kids to find learning, problem solving, and challenging themselves fun. Teach your kids to find value in and appreciate feedback, to not take criticism personally, but see it as an opportunity and a gift. Nobody is perfect and they’ll always make mistakes - it’s ok to make mistakes. But not knowing how to identify the root causes of their mistakes or how to fix them is why kids get discouraged and eventually give up. if you give them tools and show them they can figure out how to solve their own “problems”, it can be extremely empowering. They accept that they will make mistakes but they also develop confidence that they can overcome them and it’s no longer a big deal - they learn to face their mistakes and weaknesses head on without fear of feeling inadequate, unloved, etc...
 
The Outlaw said:
From our vantage point, YOU have a goal. I'm not aware of any 9-year old asking to watch film.
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Kids we knew at U9 loved watching themselves. My children and their teammates always begged to be recorded and watched themselves. They just didn't like it when adults said negative things about their plays. Surprisingly, they were actually very critical of each other (and complimentary) but they didn't get upset when teammates provided feedback. On the other hand, parents that made too many criticisms got looks. If you stick to the compliments, they'll beg to watch it with you until you need a case of beer.
 
Supermodel56 said:
Well, it happens. Here’s an example, in U9. when my kid was playing defense, prior to the game, I specifically reminded her to watch the back post because I knew she liked to go help out on defense. What did she do? she went in to help in the middle instead of watching the back post and marking the outside wing, they passed it out wide and the other team scored... She did it twice and cost them the game. Not bashing my kid, just fact.

Yes, soccer is a team sport, but she didn’t do her job in that game.
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8 year olds don't know what "watch the back post" means.
 
OrangeCountyDad said:
when my kid was 11-12 she wanted to play professionally. It was the only thing she talked about. she's 16 now, plays club/high school, has no interest in playing professionally. not sure she even wants to play in college.

just something to consider for your 9 year old.
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Your kid and almost every other... No surprise on not wanting to play professionally and hey, if she’s got a plan for something she’s passionate about, great for her!

Totally agree about not burning your kid out, but I don’t see anything wrong with helping your kid pursue their dream whatever it is and teaching them early on what it takes. Hopefully she’ll apply that work ethic to whatever she pursues. I don’t know about Luis, but for us, it has nothing to do with soccer specifically, rather developing the skills and character traits needed to get good at what you love and want to do with your life so you’re equipped to achieve your goals...
 
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